Childhood. A sense of alienation from having many siblings. A budding desire for recognition. An abnormal obsession with beauty inherited from my mother. I want to be seen more! I want attention! I want to be beautiful! Days obsessed with sex. The more I dress up, the more my self-loathing and desire for humiliation grow. The real me is not like this...more! I want to be violated more and more, covered in semen and defiled! I may be such a hopeless slut, but please masturbate for me.